Ross: Happy birthday!
生日快樂！
Monica: Happy birthday!
生日快樂！
All: Rach! Come on! Rach!
瑞秋！來過生日。瑞秋！
Monica: It's your birthday!
是你的生日耶！
Tag: Hey.
嘿！
Chandler: She's not as pretty as she was when she was 29.
她不像她29歲時那麼漂亮了。
Tag: Ms. Green would like to establish some ground rules before she comes out. She would appreciate it if you don't use the words old or downhill or they still look pretty damn good.
在葛林小姐出來之前，她要先把幾件事說清楚。她希望你們不要用到如"老"或者"走下坡"等字眼，或是"它們看來還是很棒"。
Joey: They do!
本來就是嘛！
Phoebe: Rachel! Come on out! Monica made breakfast!
瑞秋，出來。莫妮卡做了早餐。
Monica: Chocolate-chip pancakes!
巧克力脆皮餅！
Ross: We've got presents!
我們有禮物給你！
Rachel: Good ones?
送我好東西？
Monica: They all came from the list you handed out to us two weeks ago.
都是遵照你兩週前，給我們開的單子買的。
Rachel: Well, can I keep the presents and still be 29?
我可以只收禮物，但仍然是29歲嗎？
Joey: Come on Rach! Look, turning thirty is not that big a deal.
得了，瑞秋，30歲沒那麼可怕。
Ross: Oh really. Is that how you felt when you turned thirty?
是嗎？你滿30歲那天也這麼豁達？
Joey: Why God? ! Why? ! We had a deal! Let the others grow old! Not me!
上帝？！爲什麼？！我們說好的！讓別人變老，放過我！
Rachel: Oh come on you guys! Is it just me? Am I overreacting to this?
你們說說看，是不是隻有我才反應過激？
Chandler: No Rach, it's not just you. My thirtieth birthday certainly wasn't that much fun.
不，瑞秋，不只有你。我的30歲生日也不好過。
Joey: And now Chandler! We're all getting so old! Why are you doing this to us? !
現在輪到錢德勒！我們都這麼老了！你爲什麼這樣對我們？！
Monica: Rach, you're in a great place in your life. Come on, you've got a great job! Good friends.
瑞秋，老天對你不薄，工作稱心，朋友親密。
Joey: Yeah, you're roommate is a soap opera star.
室友還是肥皂劇明星！
Monica: Your character is in a coma.
你的角色在昏迷。
Chandler: I promised myself I wasn't gonna cry at this one.
我答應自己這個生日一定不哭。
Rachel: Look, you know I know my life's going pretty well, but I look around and I just see so many people who've accomplished so many other goals by the time they're thirty.
我明白，我的生活一帆風順。但是看看周圍，那麼多人在30歲前得償所願。
Phoebe: Yeah, but you shouldn't compare yourself to me.
是啊，但你不應該和我比。
All: Come on Phoebe! You can do it Phoebe! Come on!
來，菲比！你做得到的！菲比！來！
Rachel: There you go!
勝利了！
Phoebe: I did it! One mile on a hippity-hop! That's it! That's everything I wanted to do before I was thirty. Oh, except I wanted to patch things up with my sister. But oh well. Yay! And girls this thing is a Godsend if you know what I mean.
我成功了！騎行彈力球一英里！30歲前，心想事成了！沒有遺憾，不過我還想和姐姐修好。不過，耶！姑娘們，這玩意兒真是天賜寶物，懂我意思嗎？
Tag: Come on, let's have some fun. Huh? What do you want to do today?
別這樣，來做點有趣的事吧，你想做什麼？
Rachel: Nothing. I don't want to do anything.
什麼也不做。我什麼也不想做。
Monica: Well, doing nothing on your thirtieth is better than doing something stupid, like Ross.
30歲生日什麼也不幹，也勝過像羅斯那樣幹蠢事。
Ross: Hey! That was a practical purchase! I needed that car for transportation! Okay? I have a child!
住口！我買的實用品！我買車代步！懂嗎？接送孩子！
Ross: How hot do I look in this, huh? !
我在這車裏看來很拉風吧？！
Chandler: Ross, a sports car? Wouldn't it have been cheaper to just stuff a sock down there?
羅斯，跑車？要好看可以在鞋裏墊雙襪子，那樣不是省錢一些？
Ross: That's not what this is about okay? I am a sports car enthusiast. I have always been into cars.
我不是圖好看！我一直迷跑車，蓄謀已久要買車。
Joey: Hey, what's the horsepower on this thing?
這寶貝多大馬力？
Ross: I don't know, but look how shiny!
不曉得，但它多炫！
Monica: I can't believe you bought this. So can I have a ride, stud?
真不敢相信你居然買了。帥哥，載我一程吧？
Ross: Hop in. Get ready for the smoothest ride of your life.
上車。準備好踏上你這輩子最穩的一程。
Ross: Damn it.
可惡。
Phoebe: Okay, who's next?
好，接下來誰坐？
Rachel: You know what? I am going to do something today. I'm not just gonna sit around like some old lady. I'm gonna get something pierced. Like my nose or my tongue or something.
今天我一定要做點什麼。我不要像老太太一樣閒坐在這兒。我要在身上打個洞。像是鼻子，舌頭，或是別的地方。
Phoebe: Really? ! because you know that hurts.
真的？！那會很痛的。
Rachel: So what? ! You know what? The way I see it. Ow! Son of a bitch!
那又怎麼樣？！你知道什麼？我是這麼想的。嘔！賤♥人！
Tag: Look Rachel, I know what you're going through. I'm totally freaked about turning 25.
瑞秋，我完全瞭解你的感受我要過25歲生日了，多可怕。
Rachel: Get out, get out of my apartment.
請你出去，滾出我的家，
Monica: Rach for what it's worth, I think that you're doing great. I mean you know let's face it, no one handles this well.
瑞秋，不管怎樣，你還算堅強平心而論，誰過30歲生日不慌張。
Phoebe: Least of all you.
至少你們都不行。
Chandler: Would you put that back on? ! Monica's gonna be here any minute!
放回去，好嗎？！莫妮卡隨時可能回家！
Joey: But it hurt's my Joey's Apple.
可是喬伊的"蘋果"會痛。
Chandler: Okay, for the last time. It's not named for each individual man.
最後一次告訴你那叫喉結。（Adam's apple，以亞當命名）
Mrs. Geller: You've done a wonderful job with this party. Chandler. Everything looks so lovely.
你把宴會辦得真好，錢德勒，一切都很美。
Chandler: Oh well, not as lovely as you. I mean, I can't believe that you would have a thirty-year-old daughter! And you! I can't believe that you would have a tux that's thirty years old!
比不上您可愛。您竟有30歲的女兒，匪夷所思！還有您！竟有一件30歲高齡的晚禮服！
Mr. Geller: It's older than that. Ross was actually conceived right near this tuxedo.
還不止呢，懷上羅斯那次，就有這件禮服作見證。
Rachel: Hey! Everybody hide! Hide! I saw her! She's coming!
哦！快躲起來！我看見她了！她回來了！
Chandler: Everybody down! Everybody down!
大家蹲下！大家蹲下！
Chandler: Okay, everybody stay here. I will find out what's going on.
你們別動，我去偵察一下。
Monica: Hey! You got the door open!
嘿！你開門啦！
Chandler: Hey, are you drunk?
嘿，你喝醉了嗎？
Monica: No! Okay. Whoa! Okay. See I was, I was a little nervous about turning thirty. So the bus boys took me out for some drinks. I wanna puke on you later!
沒有！有點醉。哇！30歲讓我有點緊張，所以侍者的助手就帶我去喝了幾杯，呆會吐你一身！
Chandler: Okay, here is the thing. We have thrown a very formal surprise party for you in there! All of your friends are in there and your parents!
聽好，我們在家給你準備了相當正式的生日驚喜派對，親友都在裏邊！包括你爸媽！
Monica: No!
不！
Chandler: Yes!
是的！
Monica: No!
不！
Chandler: Yes!
是的！
Monica: Oh no! My parents have never seen me drunk! That they know of.
我爸媽從沒見過我喝醉！當然他們有所耳聞。
Chandler: Okay, here's the thing. We're gonna get you some coffee and they will never know that you're drunk.
有辦法了你喝杯咖啡醒醒酒，你喝醉的事就會神不知鬼不覺。
Monica: Really? ! You promise?
真的？！你發誓？
Chandler: Yeah, I'll take care of it.
我是，我會搞定的。
Monica: Okay. I love you so much.
我好愛你。
Chandler: Okay we have to do something about your breath.
你滿嘴酒氣，我們得想個招敷衍過去。
Monica: What about your breath? !
你還不是一樣！
Chandler: That's still yours. Okay, now remember it's a surprise party. So, when you go in, act surprised.
氣味是你嘴裏來的。記住，這是一個驚喜派對。你進去時要顯得很驚訝。
Chandler: Ready?
好了嗎？
All: Surprise!
驚喜！
Ross: Okay, forward. Forward. Stop! Okay, back...Stop! Okay, for...Stop! Stop! Stop!
好，前進，前進。停！好，退後，停！好，前停，停，停！
Phoebe: Okay. Okay, here's what we're gonna do. Okay, I'm gonna break into this mini-van and put it in neutral. You guys push it forward so Ross can drive out of his spot. Okay? All right, here we go. Haul ass!
好，我們這麼做。我打開這臺體旅車車門，將它放在空檔。你們把它向前推，羅斯就能開出來了。好？來吧。快閃！
Phoebe: Happy thirtieth birthday! Here! It's for the child in you, and the woman. Happy thirtieth!
30歲生日快樂！給！獻給你的童心，獻給你的女人心，30歲快樂！
Ursula: Right, why do you keep saying that?
你翻來覆去是什麼意思？
Phoebe: Because it's our thirtieth birthday.
因爲今天是我們的30歲生日。
Ursula: Yeah, no we're not thirty. We're 31. Okay.
不，我們不是30，我們31歲了，好嗎？
Phoebe: Wait!
等一下。
Ursula: Oh, it's you.
哦，是你。
Phoebe: Yeah. What? !
是，怎麼？！
Ursula: Yeah, we're not thirty, we're 31.
對，我們不是30，我們是31。
Ursula: That's what is says on my birth certificate.
我的出生證明上是這麼寫的。
Phoebe: You have your birth certificate?
你有出生證明？
Ursula: Yeah, I got a big box of family stuff when my mom died.
我媽去世時，我拿到了一箱子家庭文件。
Phoebe: Our mom.
我們的媽。
Ursula: Right! Okay.
好！好。
Phoebe: Do you have my birth certificate?
有我的出生證嗎？
Ursula: No, I sold it to a Swedish runaway.
沒有了，我賣給瑞典逃犯了。
Phoebe: Oh my God! Oh my God, we are 31.
我的老天！我的老天，我們31了。
Ursula: Yeah.
是啊。
Phoebe: I just lost a whole year of my life.
我的生命，整整損失了一年
Ursula: Okay.
算是吧。
Phoebe: Your middle name is Pamela?
你的中間名是潘蜜拉？
Ursula: Yes.
對。
Phoebe: Well, I never knew mine. Do you remember what it is?
我從不知道我的是什麼？你記得是什麼嗎？
Ursula: Yes! Phoebe.
記得！是菲比。
Phoebe: That's my first name.
那是我的名字。
Ursula: Right, okay, then no.
好吧，那我不知道。
Chandler: Look down. We made it across the room. You're doing great.
往下看，我們成功地穿過了客廳，你做的很好。
Phoebe: What's going on?
怎麼回事？
Chandler: Monica's a little drunk.
莫妮卡有一點醉了。
Phoebe: Yay! I love drunk Monica! Oh, she's so much more fun than regular Monica.
我喜歡酒醉的莫妮卡。她比正常的莫妮卡有趣多了。
Chandler: She doesn't want her parents to know she's drunk.
她不想讓她的父母知道她醉了。
Phoebe: Oh! All right! All right. Here's what we'll do, I'll get twice as drunk as Monica and then no one's will even notice her.
那好辦，只要我喝得爛醉，比莫妮還失態，大家就不會注意到她了。
Rachel: What's going on?
怎麼了？
Chandler: Monica's wasted.
莫妮卡醉了。
Ross: Maybe that will liven up this party.
這樣也許派對會更有趣。
Chandler: Okay, will you just go help her change please!
去幫她換衣服！
Rachel: Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey.
照顧醉裸女，不是一向都由喬伊出馬？
Tag: This one's from me. It wasn't on your list, but hopefully you'll think it's really fun.
這是我的禮物。這不是你的禮物單上，不過它真的很好玩。
Rachel: A scooter!
滑板車！
Ross: Stick to the list. Always stick to the list.
照着單子買。永遠記得照着單子買。
Rachel: No! No, no, I love it. Thank you.
不，我很喜歡，謝謝。
Chandler: Okay, open ours next. Open ours next!
下一個開我們的禮物，下一個開我們的！
Joey: Now that you're a couple, we don't get two presents from you guys?
你們結婚以後就可以只送一份禮物？
Chandler: For my last birthday you gave me a hug! Okay, read the card! Read the card!
你呢？上次我生日，你送我一個擁抱！念卡片！念卡片！
Rachel: Okay. Happy birthday Grandma! It's better to be over the hill then buried under it. All our love Monica and Chandler. That's funny, yeah!
生日快樂奶奶！過了高峯（超過30歲），總比葬身山腳好，愛你的：莫妮卡和錢德勒。好好笑！
Chandler: No no no no! That was the joke!
不不不！只是一個玩笑。
Rachel: No, I know! I get it! It's funny!
我知道！我看明白了，所以說好笑！
Chandler: Because you're not a grandmother.
好笑的地方是，你並非祖母。
Rachel: No I know, because to be a grandmother you have to be married and have children and I don't have any of those things. That's why it's so funny.
對啊，要當祖母，必須結婚生子，而我根本不沾邊，所以好好笑。
Monica: All you had to do was buy the card!
就讓你買張卡還這麼多事！
Rachel: Okay! You know what? I realized it was stupid to get upset about not having a husband and kids. All I really needed was a plan. See I wanna have three kids.
你知道嗎？爲沒有先生和小孩就不高興，是很蠢的。我只需要一個計劃。我想生三個小孩。
Phoebe: Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and you wanna have them for your brother.
我猜，你是想一次生三個，而且給你弟弟生對吧？
Rachel: As I was saying. I should probably have the first of the three kids by the time I'm 35. which gives me five years. So, if I wanna have my kid when I'm 35, I don't have to get pregnant until I'm 34. Which gives Prada four years to start making maternity clothes! Oh wait, but I do want to be married for a year before I get pregnant.
就是說，我應該在35歲以前生第一個。這樣我還有五年。如果我35時要生孩子，34歲前一定要懷孕。普拉達還四年時間幫我準備孕婦裝！但是，我希望在懷孕時至少已結婚一年。
Monica: Really! That long? ! Look all you want, it's happening!
當真？這麼久？你的心願，在我們身上應驗了！
Rachel: No, so I don't have to get married until I'm 33! That's three years, that's three whole years. Oh, wait a minute though. I'll need a year and a half to plan the wedding, and I'd like to know the guy for a year, year and a half before we get engaged. Which means I need to meet the guy by the time I'm thirty.
我到33歲再結婚就好。我還有3年。不過，等一下。我需要一年半來籌備婚禮。我希望能認識這個人一年至一年半再訂婚。這表示我必須在30歲時認識這個人。
Ross: Which is fine! Because you just turned twenty-eight!
沒有問題，因爲你纔剛滿28！
Rachel: No! Ross, no! It is not fine! According to my plan I should already be with the guy I wanna marry!
不！羅斯！問題大了！根據計劃，我現在就應該和我要嫁的對象在一起了。
Joey: Will you quit hogging it!
該我了！
Rachel: I'm telling you it's like watching Bambi learn how to walk.
我告訴你，這就好像看着小鹿學走路。
Ross: You're drunk! Mom and dad are gonna be mad! Maybe I'm a little drunk.
你醉了！爸媽一定會大發雷霆！我好象也有醉意。
Joey: Hey! Are those crab cakes? Did I not tell you to come straight to me when more crab cakes were ready?
嘿！那是蟹餅嗎？我不是告訴你，蟹餅好了直接端給我？
Chandler: How are you feeling?
你感覺怎麼樣？
Monica: You are so handsome! I wanna make love to you right here, right now!
你好帥！我想在此時此地和你嘿咻！
Ross: I really wish that you wouldn't.
你還是忍一忍的好。
Chandler: Now all you have to do is just get through a little bit more, okay? Then we can put you in bed, okay? Just smile and don't talk to anyone.
再撐一下子，好嗎然後我就抱你上牀睡。保持微笑，不要和任何人說話。
Phoebe: Speech! Speech! Let's hear from the birthday girl! Huh?
講兩句！講兩句！讓生日的姑娘講兩句！
Chandler: Pheebs!
菲比！
Phoebe: Don't you see? Everyone's looking at me! The plan's working! I didn't even have to take off my top yet!
看見嗎？大家都在看我。陰謀得逞！我連上衣還沒脫呢，就吸引了目光！
All: Speech! Come on Monica! Come on! Come on! Speech!
講兩句！莫妮卡講兩句！快！快！講兩句！
Mr.Geller: Hey Chandler, you can't keep your hands off her for one second!
錢德勒，你對她真是愛不釋手呢！
Mrs.Geller: Oh-ho, I think it's nice.
這很甜蜜。
Chandler: I think it's necessary.
這很必要。
Monica: I wanna thank you all for coming. My family and my friends.
感謝大家前來，各位親朋好友。
Monica: I really like to say that I'm…
我真想說，我
Monica: You know what I'd really like to say? I'm drunk! That's right mom and dad. Your little Harmonica is hammered! And guess what! I've been drunk before! And I've smoked a cigarette! You know what! You know what! It's all okay. It's okay because I turned thirty today. And, and I can do anything I want! Because I am a grown up.
知道我真想說什麼嗎？我醉了！爸媽，我不再是乖乖女！而且！猜猜怎麼着，我以前也喝醉過。我抽過煙。你知道！你知道！沒關係！沒關係！因爲我今天滿30歲了。我想做什麼就做什麼！因爲我是成年人了。
Phoebe: Okay quick, help me get this off!
好，快，替我脫掉！
Joey: Yeah!
好！
Phoebe: I lost a whole year! I can't believe it! This is so unfair!
我損失了整整一年！我不信！這太不公平！
Joey: Come on, Pheebs, it'll be okay.
菲比，沒有關係的。
Phoebe: Will it? Will it? ! I mean, how would you feel if you found out you were 31?
是嗎？是嗎？如果你發現你突然31歲了，你會有什麼感覺？
Joey: That's not gonna happen. No. Because we have a new deal!
不可能。我和上帝有了新約定！
Phoebe: Plus, it totally ruined my schedule! I haven't done any of the things I wanted to do by the time I was 31!
還有，這毀了我的計劃！我還沒做那些我31歲前想做的事。
Joey: Like what?
像什麼？
Phoebe: Like okay. I haven't met any Portuguese people! I, I haven't had the perfect kiss! And I haven't been to sniper's school!
像是我還不認識任何葡萄牙人。完美之吻還是沒發生。我還沒去上狙擊手學校！
Monica: Phoebe, you know why don't we just go upstairs and have some birthday cake?
菲比，上樓喫蛋糕好吧？
Phoebe: No, I just feel like being by myself for a while. All right? I'll see you guys later. Thanks.
我想單獨呆一會，好嗎？待會見，謝謝。
Rachel: Oh, poor Pheebs.
可憐的菲比。
Joey: Hey, you know what you guys? I think I'm gonna go walk her home.
嘿，夥計們知道嗎？我想我得去送送她。
Monica: Oh man!
哦天！
Chandler: What?
什麼？
Monica: He's gonna eat the cake!
他會把蛋糕喫了！
Joey: Pheebs! Wait up! Listen, close your eyes.
菲比！等等我！閉上眼睛。
Joey: That's one thing you can cross off your list.
你的心願清單上，可以劃掉一條了。
Phoebe: Oh yeah.
對。
Joey: Oh, and plus I'm 1/16th Portuguese.
另外我有1/16葡萄牙血統哦。
Phoebe: Oh!
哦！
Ross: Okay, is everybody clear? We're gonna pick it up and move it. Now all we need is teamwork, okay? We're gonna lift the car and slide it out. Lift and slide!
好，大家都清楚了？我們要將它抬起來，然後移動它。我們要團結一心。抬起這臺車。把它弄出來。抬起來滑出來。抬和滑！
Rachel: Ross, I really don't think…
羅斯，我真的不覺得這
Ross: Lift! And slide!
抬！滑出去！
Chandler: Okay, here we go.
好吧，開始。
Ross: All right everyone, lift! And slide!
好的，大家一起來。抬起來！滑出來！
Rachel: Hey Joey.
嘿，喬伊。
Joey: Oh, come on Rach! My turn just started!
拜託，瑞秋！纔剛輪到我！
Rachel: Actually, I just wanna talk to Tag.
其實我是要和泰格說話。
Joey: Oh. Okay. Hey, can I ride this outside?
好，我可以到外面溜嗎？
Rachel: Whatever! Okay, I'm not your mother.
隨你便，我又不是你媽。
Rachel: Not in the street!
不要到街上！
Tag: How are you doing? Are you feeling any better?
覺得怎麼樣？有沒有覺得好一點？
Rachel: Yeah, I'm doing okay. I'm…let's talk.
有，我很好，我我們談談。
Tag: What's up?
什麼事？
Rachel: Oh Tag, you're such a great guy and we have so much fun together but I don't…
泰格你真是個好男人，我們在一起很開心。可是我
Tag: Wait! I think I see where you're going, but before you say anything else, can I just say one more thing?
等一下！我想我知道你要做什麼。在你說任何話之前，我可以先說一件事嗎？
Rachel: Well said. And a good example of the fun I was referring to, but I just think I'm past the point where I think I can you know, just have fun.
說得很好。我們那麼開心，有吻爲證。不過我已經過了開心就好的階段了。
Tag: Rachel, don't do this. This is just because you're turning thirty.
瑞秋，別這樣。這只是因爲你30歲了。
Rachel: Yeah, it is! But you're just a kid! I mean you're 25!
是的。而你只是個孩子！你才25歲！
Tag: Twenty-four actually.
其實是24歲。
Rachel: Oh God! You know what I wish? I wish you were six years older. Well actually, if I'm wishing for stuff, I actually wish I was six years younger.
老天！你知道我會許的什麼願？我希望你比現在大6歲。假如真要許願，其實我希望自己年輕6歲。
Tag: Me too.
我也是。
Rachel: Yeah, I'm sorry.
是啊，對不起。
Chandler: Hey! How'd it go?
嘿！談得怎麼樣？
Rachel: Oh, if I only want two kids, can I keep him for another year?
如果只要兩個孩子，能不能把他再留一年？
Phoebe: You did the right thing.
你的決定沒錯。
Joey: I don't like this anymore.
我厭倦這玩意兒了。
Chandler: Well, here we are, just a bunch of thirty year olds.
我們在這兒，一羣30歲的人。
Ross: Do you realize in ten years we're gonna be 40?
你知道再過10年，我們就40歲了？
Joey: Why God? ! Why are you doing this to us? !
爲什麼！上帝！這樣對我們？！
Ross: Yes! My baby's finally free!
哈！寶貝車總算解脫了！
Joey: All right! Start it up! Let's go!
好極了！發動！我們走！
The Man In The Sportscar: How hot are we?
我們拉不拉風？
Ross: You wanna buy a car?
你要買車嗎？