Chandler: Hello? Hello?
你好？你好？
Monica: I love my new job!
我愛死我的新工作了！
Chandler: Honey, you're screaming.
親愛的，你在吼叫。
Monica: You bet your ass I am! I just had the best first day, ever! The kitchen, twice as big as Allessandro's.
你說的沒錯，我就是！這工作是有史以來最棒的！那個廚房，比之前的餐廳大兩倍……
Chandler: Oh, that's great.
喔，太棒了。
Monica: Yeah, a-a-and clean. Not just health department clean...Monica clean.
說到乾淨，不只是符合衛生局標準……是莫妮卡式的乾淨。
Chandler: Awesome.
酷斃了。
Monica: Oh, and the people are so nice.
喔，還有同事都很好。
Monica: There's this one guy, Jeffrey, he's the maitre d', Chandler, you will love him.
有一個男的叫傑佛瑞，他是餐廳領班錢德，你會很喜歡他的！
Monica: He is without a doubt, the funniest guy I have ever met.
毫無疑問他是我遇過最風趣的男人了！
Mike: This is nice.
這真棒。
Phoebe: I know!
我知道。
Mike: You need both hands for that?
你需要兩隻手纔打得開？
Phoebe: Yeah, I kinda do. Well, how's this?
是啊，應該是要。嗯，那這樣呢？
Mike: Are you sure that's sweet enough?
你確定那樣夠甜嗎？
Joey: Aah, look at you two...holding hands...huh is this getting serious?
瞧瞧你們……兩個手握着手……是不是開始認真了呢？
Joey: Have you not talked about it yet? Am I making you uncomfortable? If you were bigger you'd hit me, huh? Aaahh
你們有沒有談過了呢？我是不是讓你們很不舒服呢？如果你再高壯一點你就會扁我了…… 對不對？
Phoebe: I'm sorry...I'm sorry. It's obviously way too early for us to be...having that conversation.
不好意思。很明顯地現在就討論那種事……對我們而言是太早了。
Mike: Is it?
會嗎？
Phoebe: Maybe not, is it?
或許不會，會嗎？
Mike: Ok, when I got divorced, I-I didn't think I'd feel this way about someone for a really long time...
當我離♥婚後……有一段很長的時間我不認爲會對任何人有這種感覺……
Mike:Then again, I didn't think I'd meet someone like you...and...this may be crazy soon, but...I want you to have this...
而且，我也不認爲會遇到像你這樣的人……這或許太瘋狂快速了，但我希望給你這個……
Mike:No, not...that's gum.
不，不是……那是口香糖。
Mike:Ooh, five bucks...I love it when that happens, you know...Think no note's there...
喔，五塊錢！我超喜歡這種事發生的，你知道嗎？你不知道那裏有……
Phoebe: I know. Mike, why don't you keep digging?
我知道，繼續挖。
Mike: Oh, sorry.
抱歉。
Phoebe: Oh, it's a key. To be honest, I think I'd prefer the five dollars.
是一隻鑰匙。老實說，我想我寧可要那五塊錢。
Mike: It's to my apartment.
我公寓的鑰匙。
Phoebe: Oh wow, ooh! Ooh, big step for Phoebe and Mike.
哇！菲比跟麥克兩人關係的一大步。
Mike: Yeah, look, and I don't want you to feel like you have to give me your key just because...
我不希望你覺得這樣，你也要給我你的鑰匙……
Phoebe: Oh no, I want to.
不，我要。
Mike: Oh, thank God.
感謝上帝。
Phoebe: Yeah...ooh...wow...Even started to think I'd never meet someone that, you know, I wanted to...do this with. Here you go.
哇，我本來還在想我應該不會遇到一個人……讓我想要這樣做的。拿去吧！
Mike: This is cool, huh?
這太酷了。
Phoebe: Really is.
真的是很酷。
Joey: Oh, I know it...It is amazing these little things open doors...huh!
我知道，太驚人了，這些小東西可以把門打開！
Rachel: So I don't go back to work for another four weeks, but we would like our nanny to start right away, so that Emma could get a chance to know her.
我四星期之後才需要回去上班，但是我們希望我們的保姆可以馬上上班，那艾瑪纔有時間熟悉她。
Nanny Candidate: I think that's really smart.
我想這樣做是很聰明的。
Nanny Candidate:The easier we can make the transition for her, the better.
我們換手過程越流暢，對她越好。
Rachel: That's great, great. So do you have any questions for us?
太棒了，很好。那你有沒有其他的問題想問我們呢？
Nanny Candidate: Not really.
沒有。
Rachel: All right. Well thank you so much for coming...
好了，那謝謝你跑這麼一趟……
Ross: Thank you.
謝謝。
Rachel: Really nice to meet you...and we'll call you.
很高興認識你……我們會打電話給你。
Nanny Candidate: Oh, you know, wait. I do have one question. Do you guys do random drug testing?
喔，等一下。我是有一個問題。你們會不定期對人做毒品測試嗎？
Ross: Boy, we uhm...hadn't really thought of that.
天啊，我們還真的沒想過這個。
Nanny Candidate: That's cool. But...but if you do, I'm gonna need three days notice.
沒關係，但是如果你們要求要做，我需要你們提前三天告訴我。
Rachel: Okidoki! Wow! We're never gonna find a nanny.
好的，沒問題！我們永遠都找不到保姆了。
Ross: Oh, come on Rach, we will. I promise. We have more interviews.
別這樣，瑞秋，我保證我們會找到的。我們還有其他的面試情況。
Ross:And worse comes to worse, we can always reconsider the uhm...the first one we met with.
不可能更糟，我們總是可以重新考慮第一個人選。
Rachel: What, the blonde with no bra?
什麼？那個沒穿胸罩的金髮女郎嗎？
Ross: She was blonde?
她的頭髮是金色的嗎？
Ross:Just a sec! Ok, ok. This one's name is Sandy.
等一下！好的，這個叫做珊帝。
Ross:Uh, she's got a degree in early childhood education, uhm...she worked for her last family for three years.
她有幼兒教育學位，她在上個工作的家庭做了三年。
Rachel: Ok...
好……
Sandy: Hi...I'm Sandy.
嗨，我是珊帝。
Ross: And she's a little mannish...
而且她看起來有點男性化……
Phoebe: Oh my God! David!
喔，我的天！大衛！
David: Hi! I-i-is this a bad time?
現在會打擾你嗎？
Phoebe: No! It's a great time, come in!
不，現在很好！進來吧！
Phoebe:WOW, hi...Oh my gosh! What're you doing here? Are you back from Minsk?
哇！嗨！喔，天啊！你在這裏做什麼呢？你從明斯克回來嗎？
David: Well, just for a couple of days, uhm...I'm-I'm here to explain to the people who gave us our grant, why it's a positive thing that we spent all their money and uhm...accomplished uhm...nothing.
只回來幾天，我是回來跟提供基金的人解釋……爲什麼我們花光了所有他們給的錢……什麼都沒有做出是件正常的事。
Phoebe: Who cares, it got you here.
誰在乎呢？反正你回來了。
David: Well, it-it got me to New York anyway, and then I got on a cab at the airport, and-and the guy said where to? and I just...gave him your address, I...I...I didn't even think about it.
我回到紐約，然後在機場叫了部計程車，司機問我要去哪？我想都沒想就給了他你的地址。
Phoebe: Wow. Where is your luggage?
你的行李呢？
David: Damn it!
該死！
Phoebe: A-All right, well...I'll-I'll call the cab company.
好了，我來打電話給計程車公司。
David: Wa...wa...wait! We can...call them later. Can you just...just stand there f-f-for a moment?
我們可以等一下再打。你可以先站在那邊一下子嗎？
David: Boy! There's an old Russian expression, uhm...it goes: Schto ya ztez vigul...ui! Roughly translated that means uhm...Th-this thing that I'm looking at: wow!
天啊！有一句俄羅斯老諺語是這樣的：Schto ya ztez vigul... ui！大略的翻譯就是：美豔不可方物！”
Phoebe: Thank you! God, no! You should see me when...Oh actually, no, I look pretty good.
謝謝你！你應該看看當我…… 事實上，不用，我看起來挺不錯的。
David: Are...are you kidding?
你在開玩笑嗎？
David:You know, when you don't see someone for a long time, a-a-and you kind of build them up in your head and then you start thinking well, come on, don't be crazy. Nobody is that beautiful, but...well, you are.
你知道的，當很久沒有見到一個人，你會在腦海中建立起這個人的影像 然後開始想：“少來了，別發神經了，沒有人是那樣美的，”但是，嗯，你真的就是那樣美。
David:Well, so, uhm...well, are you seeing...anyone?
那麼，你現在有在跟誰交往嗎？
Phoebe: No...
沒有……
Phoebe: I'm...I'm just...I'm the worst person ever. How can I not tell David that I'm seeing Mike?
我是最糟糕的人！我怎麼可以不告訴大衛我跟麥克在一起呢？
Monica: Maybe he didn't give you a chance.
或許他沒有給你機會說。
Phoebe: He said: Are you seeing someone? And I said no...
他問我有沒有跟誰交往，而我說沒有……
Monica: Oh, well...That'd been your window.
喔，那本來是你可以澄清的機會的。
Phoebe: Yeah! I mean, I don't know. I was just, I was looking, I was looking in his eyes and I was just thinking: Oh my God! It's David. David's here. He's just, he's so irresistible.
我真的不知道，我看着他的雙眼……然後只能想：我的天！是大衛，大衛在這裏。他真是令人無法抗拒。
Monica: Really? Th-the scientist guy?
真的嗎？那個科學家？
Phoebe: Really? Chandler?
真的嗎？錢德？
Monica: Continue...
繼續說……
Phoebe: Oh. Ok, then it gets worse, 'cause then I told him that I would see him tomorrow night.
然後越來越糟糕……因爲我答應他明晚跟他見面。
Monica: Phoebe!
菲比！
Phoebe: I know! Evil! And...and...and...I like Mike so much, you know. It's just going really well. Oh my God!
我知道！邪惡的女人！我真的好喜歡麥克，你知道嗎？發展得真的很順利。我的天！
Monica: Wow, isn't it ironic that David would show up on the same day that you and Mike exchange keys?
大衛出現在你跟麥克交換鑰匙的同一天……這真是很諷刺。
Phoebe: Uhuh...Yeah! You know. And given my life long search for irony, you could imagine how happy I am.
是啊，而且你知道我一輩子都在找尋諷刺的事……你可以想像的到我有多開心！
Monica: What're you gonna do?
你要怎麼辦呢？
Phoebe: I-I mean I guess, I just have to...tell David that nothing can happen between us.
我想我只能……告訴大衛我們之間是不可能的。
Phoebe:Unless I don't...You know, complicated moral situation, no right, no wrong...
除非我不用告訴他……你知道的，複雜的道德情況……是沒有錯或對。
Monica: You have to tell David!
你必須要告訴大衛。
Phoebe: Ok, I knew I should have had this conversation with Joey.
我就知道我應該去問喬伊纔對。
Chandler: Funniest guy she's ever met! I'm funny, right...? What'd you know, you're a door...You just like knock-knock jokes...Save it for inside!
她遇過最風趣的男人……我很風趣，不是嗎？你知道個什麼？你只是一道門……你就像是“敲敲門”笑話……等到裏面再發揮。
Monica: Heeeeeey! Chandler: Hey! Phoebe: Hey!
嘿！嘿！嘿！
Chandler: So...Oklahoma is a crazy place. You know, they call it the Sooner state.
奧克拉荷馬真是瘋狂。他們把那裏稱爲早到者之州。
Chandler:Frankly I'd sooner be in any other state.
事實上，我還真希望可以早點離開到其它的州！
Chandler:And what's with Oklahoma having a pan handle?
而且奧克拉荷馬爲什麼有個平底鍋柄呢？
Chandler:Can all states have stuff like that? Hey yeah, I'm from the waistband, Wyoming.
其它的州可以有像那樣的東西嗎？嘿，我是從懷俄明州的腰部來的。
Chandler:But when I was seven, we headed over to the crotch.
但是當我七歲的時候，我們就搬到胯下部了。
Monica: Was your cabin pressurised?
你的機艙是不是壓力太大？
Chandler: And don't get me started on the way that people from Tulsa talk.
而且不要讓我開始告訴你們土爾沙人說話的方式。
Phoebe: Ok.
好的。
Chandler: What's with the word y'all? You know, just...two words just...pushed together...
“你全”到底是個什麼字呢？只不過是“你們”跟“全部”加在一起……
Chandler:Are we all allowed to do that, because if so, I say why stop there?
我們可以那樣做嗎？因爲如果可以，還有很多字可以這樣玩。
Chandler:You know, your-your new poodle could be your noodle.
你的“新獅子狗” 可以變成你的“新獅”。
Chandler:And fried chicken? Could be frickin.
“油炸雞塊”可以變成“炸塊”服務生？
Chandler:Waiter, waiter, 'scuse me, I'll have the frickin? See, that's...that's funny with the frickin, right?
服務生，不好意思 我想要點“炸塊”！瞧，“炸塊”，很好笑吧？
Monica: No, it's reminded me of something this guy did today at work.
不，只是讓我想起今天工作時有個人講的笑話。
Monica:I-I told you about that funny guy, Jeffrey, right?
我有跟你提過一個風趣的人叫做傑佛瑞，對嗎？
Chandler: Yeah, he came up...
是啊，你提過……
Monica: Ok. Well, he did this bit...You probably had to be there, but it was uh, Laizah Minelli locked in our freezer, eating a raw chicken.
嗯，他做了一件事……你應該要在現場才感受的到……莉莎明妮莉被鎖在冰箱裏面喫生雞肉。
Chandler: Were you there?
你在現場嗎？
Phoebe: No, but it sounds like it was frickin funny...
沒有，但是聽起來非常（與炸塊同字）好笑……
Sandy: I really do understand how hard it's gotta be to leave your child with another person.
我真的可以理解要把孩子交付給另一個人是很困難的事。
Sandy:I mean, it's like leaving behind a piece of your heart...
我是說，這就像把心上的一塊肉割下……
Rachel: Sandy, that's exactly what it is...
珊帝，這正是如此……
Ross: Are you gay?
你是同性戀嗎？
Rachel: I'm sorry, that's our Ross. He's just Mr. Shoot Straight From The Hip.
我很抱歉，這就是我們的羅斯。他總是直言不諱。
Sandy: It's ok. I get that a lot doing what I do. But I am straight. I'm-I'm engaged actually.
沒關係，我的工作常引來誤會。但我不是同性戀，事實上我已經訂婚。
Rachel: Oh!
喔！
Sandy: Her name is Deliah.
她的名字叫做狄莉亞。
Rachel: Oh, that's pretty.
真是好名字。
Ross: So you're-you're just like a...guy who's a nanny?
所以你只是一個當保姆的男人？
Sandy: I realise how it's...a bit unorthodox for some people, but, I really believe, the most satisfying thing you can do with your life, is take care of a child.
我知道這對一些人來說是很顛覆傳統的，但我真的相信照顧小孩是一輩子當中……最令人感到滿足的事。
Ross: Ok.
好的。
Sandy: Like in my last job, I met Daniel when he was three weeks old.
就像我上一個工作……我在丹尼爾三星期大的時候就認識他。
Sandy:And I got to watch him grow into this awesome person...
然後我看着他成長變成一個很棒的人……
Sandy:When I left, I said: I'll see you soon...
當我離開的時候，我說：“希望很快再見到你”……
Sandy:And he said to me: Skdandy...That was his name for me...I'll see you every day...right in...
然後他說“珊卡丹帝”……那是他給我的名字……“我每天都會看到你在……”
Ross: Yeah, kids say all kinds of crap.
是啊，小孩子盡是會說些鬼話。
Rachel: Oh God, she must...she must need her diaper changed.
喔，天啊，她一定是需要換尿布了。
Sandy: Oh, oh, I-I can do it for her, if you want...
我可以幫你處理，如果你要的話……
Rachel: Oh, that would be great!
太棒了！
Sandy: Uh, Just so you know, these dinosaur toys, aren't really age-appropriate.
順便跟你說一下，那些恐龍玩具可能不適合她的年齡。
Ross: They're mine.
那些是我的。
Sandy: Oh. Also not, age-appropriate.
同樣也是不適齡。
Rachel: I love him, I love him, I love him...
我愛他，我愛他，我愛他！
Ross: Oh, come on, Rachel, he's a guy!
別這樣，瑞秋，他是個男人！
Rachel: So He's smart, he's qualified. Give me one good reason we shouldn't try him out.
那又如何？他很聰明，資歷又符合。給我一個理由爲什麼我們不能試用他。
Ross: Because, it's weird!
因爲這實在太奇怪了！
Rachel: Why?
爲什麼？
Rachel:Wow, I never looked at it that way.
哇，我從來都沒有那樣想過。
Ross: Wh-what kind of job is that for a man? A nanny? I mean it's like i-if a woman wanted to be...
男人做那種工作像話嗎？保姆？我是說，那就像一個女人想要成爲……
Rachel: Yes?
什麼？
Ross: King?
國王？
Sandy: I uh...I hope you don't mind. I used some of my home-made lotion on Emma.
我希望你不介意，我在艾瑪身上用了我自制的乳液。
Sandy:It's a mixture of calendula and honey cream. It'll dry that rash right up.
那是混合金盞花跟蜂蜜的乳液。對紅疹是立即見效的。
Sandy:Plus...it keeps the hands young...
而且，使雙手保持年輕……
Rachel: Yes! Sandy you're hired.
是的！珊帝，你被錄取了！
Sandy: That's great! I'm sorry. It's just...such an emotional thing when you're welcomed into a new family...
太棒了！不好意思。只是被歡迎加入一個新家庭是一件很令人感動的事……
Rachel: Oooh...God, come here.
喔，天啊，過來這裏。
Ross: You gotta be at least bi...
你至少也是雙性戀……
Chandler: Hey!
嘿！
Chandler:I need you to set me up for a joke. Later, when Monica is around, I need you to ask me about fire trucks.
我需要你幫忙讓我講笑話……當莫妮卡在的時候，問我消防車怎樣。
Joey: Ooh. I-I don't know Chan. I'm-I'm not so good with remembering lines.
我不知道，錢德，我不是很會記臺詞的。
Chandler: Well, thank God your livelihood doesn't depend on it.
感謝上帝你不是靠記臺詞喫飯的。
Joey: I know, right? Wh...Wh...Why are we doing this?
我知道，棒吧？我們爲什麼要這樣做呢？
Chandler: Monica says that her maitre d' is the funniest guy she's ever met.
莫妮卡說他們餐廳的領班是她遇過最風趣的男人。
Joey: Seriously? She actually said that?
真的嗎？她真的那樣說？
Chandler: Yes! Am I crazy to be this upset?
是的，我這樣不爽很瘋狂嗎？
Joey: No! Being funny's your thing!
不！風趣是你的專利！
Chandler: Yeah!
是啊！
Joey: Without that, you just got "lame with women". Chandler: Ye....
沒有了它，你還有什麼吸引女人的！耶……
Monica: Hi! There you are.
嗨！你們都在。
Joey: Fire trucks!
消防車！
David: Hi.
嗨。
Phoebe: Hi.
嗨。
David: Oh, I-I-I brought you this from Minsk. Um, You-you're not going to believe this, uh, this is lemon-flavored vodka.
我從明斯克帶回來這個給你，你不會相信的，這是檸檬口味的伏特加。
Phoebe: Wow. we-uh-we actually, uhm, we-we have this here.
是嗎？事實上這裏也有。
David: I traded four pairs of Levi's for that.
我用四條牛仔褲換來的。
Phoebe: Thanks, thanks anyway.
謝謝你。
David: Wow, you-you look even...more beautiful than you did yesterday.
哇，你看起來比昨天更美麗。
Phoebe: Oof...
唔……
David: In fact, ehm...I'm going to kiss you now.
事實上，我現在要親你。
Phoebe: Oh, wait, wait!
喔，等等！
David: Yeah, I-I don't, I can't get away with stuff like that. I-I-It sounded sexy in my head, so I...
我就是沒有辦法……在我腦海中聽起來很性感，所以我……
Phoebe: No, no, it's-it's not that.
不，不，不是那件事。
Phoebe:Uhm...Remember when you asked me if I was seeing someone and I said no?
你記得當你問我有沒有跟誰交往而我告訴你沒有嗎？
Phoebe:Well, uhm...I am. His...his name is Mike.
事實上我有，他叫做麥克。
David: Oh...oh...
喔……哦……
Phoebe: Yeah, I should've told you.
我應該早點告訴你的。
David: No...well, yeah.
不用……嗯，你應該要的。
Phoebe: I'm sorry, I-I wanted to tell you. But you know, then I just got lost in your eyes...and I-I just forgot all about...
我很抱歉，我想告訴你。但是我又沉醉在你的眼神中……然後我就完全忘了……
David: Mike?
麥克？
Phoebe: Right, yes, uhuh. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
是的，沒錯。我很抱歉，我很抱歉。
David: Well, it's-it's ok, it's ok. I-I-I understand...Well, so...well, are you happy with this guy?
沒關係，我可以理解……那你跟這個人在一起快樂嗎？
Phoebe: I am happy.
我是很快樂。
David: Damn it!
該死！
David:I-I'm sorry. I-I don't mean that. I-I want you to be happy...But only with me.
我很抱歉，我不是那個意思。我要你過得快樂……但是隻能跟我。
David:No, that-that's not fair. Uh, who cares, leave him! Oh, I don't mean that. Yes I do...I'm sorry. Uhm, I...I think I should probably uhm...go...
不，那並不公平。管他的，拋棄他吧！我不是那個意思，是的，我是……我很抱歉。我想我應該離開了……
Phoebe: Uh...but David, just...I just want you to know that...that...you know...telling you this...is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
但是，大衛，我只想要你知道……跟你坦白是我做過最困難的事。
David: Well...just so you know...hearing it wasn't exactly a Vladnik carnival either...Can we at least hug goodbye?
嗯，讓你知道一下……聽到這件事也不是像在過嘉年華……我們至少可以擁抱道別吧？
Phoebe: Of course, yeah. You know, a-a kiss on the cheek wouldn't be totally inappropriate...
當然，可以，你知道的，在臉頰上親一下應該不會是太不適當……
David: No...no...Phoebe: I mean...
不……不……我是說……
David: In Minsk...Phoebe: Yeah?
在明斯克…… 怎樣呢？
David: it's uhm...it's-it's two on each cheek and uhm...and one on the lips.
是在兩邊各親兩下……還有一下親在脣上。
Phoebe: Well, if that's what they do in Minsk...In New York...it's...
嗯，好吧，如果那是明斯克的習♥俗。在紐約，是……
Rachel: Oh...Oh boy...Hi...
喔，天啊……嗨……
Ross: Is everything all right?
一切都還好吧？
Rachel: Oh yeah, it's fine, it's fine. Sandy was just...was just telling me about how he proposed to his fiancée and it was just so beautiful.
喔，是的，很好，很好。珊帝只是在告訴我他是如何跟他未婚妻求婚的……實在是太夢幻了。
Sandy: Well, her favourite flower is the camellia. From the poem...
她最喜歡的花是山茶花。從那首詩……
Rachel: I can't...I can't hear it again.
我沒辦法再聽一次。
Sandy: You know, I can't tell it again...
我也沒辦法再說一次……
Ross: And I'm fine never having heard it...Rachel, can I...can I see you for a sec?
而我也還好不用聽到……瑞秋，我可以跟你說一下話嗎？
Rachel: Yeah! Excuse me...
好啊，失陪了……
Ross: Do you realise that man has cried in our apartment three times...? Huh? I haven't cried that many times since I moved in.
你有發現那男人在我們家已經哭過三次了嗎？我從搬進來之後也沒哭過那麼多次。
Rachel: Come on Ross, you got a little misty when Ben broke your l-heart-fossils mug.
別這樣，羅斯，當班打破你的 “我愛化石”馬克杯，你也哭了啊！
Ross: I'll have you know that was a farewell gift from my colleagues at the museum. Ok? They all chipped in for that.
那個馬克杯可是博物館同事送我的離別禮物。好嗎？他們全部一起出錢買的。
Rachel: Well, they must've all loved you very much.
他們一定都很喜歡你。
Rachel: Look, Ross, he's just...Sandy is just sensitive, that's all.
聽着，羅斯，珊帝只不過是很敏感，不過是如此。
Ross: Ok, ok, see...that...that is the problem. He is too sensitive.
好了，看吧，那就是個問題。他太敏感了。
Rachel: What...? Too sensitive to take care of our baby?
什麼？太敏感就不能照顧我們的小孩嗎？
Ross: Yeah, I mean, all things that guy...These are amazing!
不，我是說，那個男的…… 這真是太好喫了！
Rachel: Sandy made Madeleines.
珊帝做的馬德琳餅乾。
Ross: This...this is exactly what I'm talking about.
這就正是我在說的。
Ross:What kind of a guy makes...makes...delicate French cookies, huh? They're not even...butch, manly cookies with...with...you know with...with chunks.
什麼樣的男人會做精緻的法式餅乾呢？看起來根本不像是男性化雄糾糾的餅乾，有那種……你知道的，大塊咬的快♥感！
Rachel: Well, I...you know, I-I-I don't know what to say...
嗯，你知道的，我不知道能說什麼……
Rachel:I mean, I never thought of you as a guy who needed his men to be men.
我是說，我從沒想過你是那種需要“男人”是真正男人的男人。
Rachel:You know, 'cause I gotta tell you. Ross, it not like you just came in from branding cattle.
你知道，我必須告訴你。羅斯，你也不像是臉上有烙印的男子漢。
Ross: Hey...there's sensitive...and there is too sensitive.
嘿，敏感跟太敏感是有區別的。
Rachel: Ok, what? What is too sensitive?
好吧，那什麼是叫做太敏感呢？
Phoebe: Hmm. No, I can't, I can't do this. It's, it's bad.
不，我不能，我不能這樣做，這樣不好
David: But...I-I-It's nice...A-a-and...nice is good.
但是感覺很棒，而很棒就是好。
David:A-a-and good is not bad, ergo, w-w-we should keep kissing.
而好就不是壞事，因此，我們應該繼續親吻。
Phoebe: No, no. No.
不，不，不。
David: But...ergo...
但是……但是什麼？
Phoebe: Look David, if...if you had never left, then...yeah, we'd probably still be together right now, but...but you did leave, and I'm-I'm with Mike and I really care about him...
聽着，大衛，如果你沒有離開過……那或許現在我們還是在一起的，但是你離開了，而我現在跟麥克交往而且我很在乎他……
David: Ok. Well, he's very lucky.
好的。嗯，他很幸運。
Phoebe: Thank you.
謝謝你。
David: Uhm...uhm...Goodbye...Uh...Schto ya ztez vigul...ui...
再見……
Mike: So, hey, the key works!
鑰匙可以用！
Phoebe: Hi Mike! And you, thanks for the, face massage. Thank you.
嗨，麥克！還有你，謝謝你的臉部按♥摩！謝謝你！
Ross: Did Rachel tell you we hired a male nanny?
瑞秋有告訴你我們僱了一個男保姆嗎？
Monica: Yeah! I think that's great!
我認爲那太棒了！
Ross: Oh really? Did she tell you he plays the recorder, recites poetry and bakes Madeleines?
她有說他會吹直笛，吟詩還會做馬德琳餅乾嗎？
Monica: Oh...How are they?
好喫嗎？
Ross: Lighter than air...But that's not the point.
好喫極了，但那不是重點。
Joey: Hey! Ross: Hey! Rachel and I hired a male nanny.
嘿！嘿！瑞秋跟我僱了一個男保姆。
Joey: Really? Guys do that? That's weird.
真的嗎？男生會做那樣的工作嗎？真是奇怪。
Ross: Thank you!
謝謝你！
Joey: Yeah, that's like a woman wanting to be a...
那就像是女人想要成爲……
Ross: A what? A what? What's the end of that sentence?
什麼？成爲什麼？
Monica: Yes...What is the end of that sentence?
是啊，成爲什麼？
Joey: Uhm...A penis model. Anyway, hey...Did you tell Chandler that some guy from work is the funniest guy you've ever met?
陰♥莖模特兒！你有告訴錢德有一個男同事……是你遇過最風趣的男人嗎？
Monica: Yeah, so?
有啊，怎樣呢？
Ross: Wow!
哇！
Joey: Really? Do you not know Chandler?
真的嗎？你是不認識錢德嗎？
Monica: Is that why he's acting so weird? He's jealous?
這就是他最近行爲詭異的原因嗎？他在喫醋嗎？
Monica:Oh my God, that is crazy. It's not like I'm attracted to Jeffrey!
喔，我的天，這真是太瘋狂了。又不是說我喜歡上傑佛瑞！
Joey: So what? Being funny is Chandler's thing. You know, like Ross's thing is...
那又怎樣？風趣是錢德的專長。就像羅斯的專長就是……
Ross: Science? Academia? Being a good father?
科學？學術？好父親？
Joey: No...
不……
Monica: I can't believe he's that upset about this.
我不敢相信他在不高興。
Joey: Are you kidding? That's like Chandler saying he met someone who was more uptight than you.
你在開玩笑嗎？這就像是錢德告訴你他遇到比你更急躁不安的人一樣。
Monica: Excuse me?
什麼？
Joey: I'm sorry. Sorry. More controlling than you.
抱歉，對不起，應該是比你更控制狂。
Monica: Well, that's better.
嗯，好多了。
Joey: Yeah, ok. But, Monica, you're gonna have to do some damage control here, 'cause he's feeling like...
是的，好了。你要做一些事來彌補因爲他覺得……
Chandler: Hey!
嘿！
Joey: Heeyy! Hey!
嘿！
Chandler: What're you guys talking about?
你們在說些什麼？
Ross: Uhm...Rachel and I, uh, hired a male nanny.
瑞秋跟我僱了一個男保姆。
Chandler: You got a man who's a nanny? You got a manny?
你僱了一個男人當保姆？你僱了一個“男保”？
Chandler: You know, I don't mind a male nanny, but I do draw the line at a male wet nurse.
你知道的，我是不介意男保姆……但是我倒是很介意男的洗澡護士。
Monica: Oohhh...you are on a roll, mister!
你真是太酷了，老兄！
Chandler: If I'd known you guys were coming over, I would've brought more pizza.
如果我知道你們要過來，我就會多買幾份批薩。
Monica: Ok, ok...stop, you...you stop it!
好了！好啦！停止，你們！你們停止！
Chandler: What is so funny about that? Monica?
那有什麼好笑的呢？莫妮卡？
Monica: I don't know...It's-It's...well it's just the way you say it...I mean, you're funny...You have that funny thing. You're a funny guy!
我不知道，就是…… 你說的方式很好笑……我是說，你很風趣 ……你有風趣的特質，就是很風趣的人！
Chandler: Did you tell her what we talked about?
你跟她說我們談過的事嗎？
Joey: Yeah...
是……
Chandler: So those were pity laughs? Pity laughs?
所以那些是同情的笑聲嗎？同情笑聲！
Monica: Honey, listen...You have nothing to worry about with Jeffrey.
親愛的，聽着……你根本不需要擔心傑佛瑞。
Chandler: Oh yeah? Is he funnier than me?
喔，是嗎？他比我風趣嗎？
Monica: Well, you're...you're different funny...I mean, you're...you're more sarcastic and-and...well, he does...bits...and impressions...and...and limericks...
你們風趣的方式不同……我是說，你是比較挖苦式的，嗯，他是做一些模仿跟打油詩等等的……
Chandler: I-I do limericks. Uhm, there once was a man named Chandler, whose wife made him die inside.
我也會打油詩啊！有一個叫做錢德的男的，他老婆讓他死在裏頭。
Monica: Honey, you know I think you're hilarious! Come on, you know that joke you told me last week?
親愛的，你知道我認爲你超好笑的！你知道你上星期告訴我的笑話嗎？
Monica:The one about Jerry Lewis and the girl with the lazy eye... That slayed me.
傑瑞路易斯跟有惺忪睡眼女生的笑話，那真是笑死我了。
Ross: Hey...I made up that joke and told it to you!
嗨！那是我編出來告訴你的！
Joey: Not knowing when to shut up.
不知道什麼時候該閉嘴。
Ross: Yep! That's my thing. Joey: Yep.
是的！那就是我的專長。
Mike: So...how many guys have your key?
有多少男人有你家的鑰匙呢？
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no, it's not, it's not, it's not as bad as it looks. Really, I was just, I was saying goodbye to an old friend.
不，不，不，不，不，實際情況並不像看起來這樣糟，我只是在跟一個老朋友道別。
Mike: Your lipstick's on his mouth.
你的口紅都在他脣上了。
David: Oh, uh...uh, we just uh...happen to wear the same shade.
我們只是剛好都用相同的口紅。
Phoebe: No, uhm...David and I did use to go out...but years ago, and he lives in Minsk. He's only...he's only in town for a couple of days.
不，我跟大衛以前在一起過……但是是幾年前了，而且他住在明斯克。他只是回來幾天而已。
Mike: Did you uhm...
你有沒有……
Phoebe: No, no...
不，不……
Mike: kiss him?
親他？
Phoebe: Oh, well, yeah.
喔，嗯，有。
David: Yes, but uhm...Look, she, she really likes you.
是的，但是…… 聽着，她真的很喜歡你。
David:In-In fact, she stopped what was a-a pretty amazing kiss.
事實上，她停止了一個相當美好的親吻。
Phoebe: David, David, David, David.
大衛，大衛，大衛，大衛。
David: No, no no. He should hear this. I-I-I don't think you realise just-just how lucky you are, fella.
不，不，不，他應該要知道的。我不認爲你知道你有多幸運，老兄。
Mike: Don't point your finger at me.
別用手指指着我。
David: Why? What-What're you gonna do about it?
爲什麼？你要怎樣呢？
David:Well, I'll show you what I'm gonna do about it.
好的，我會讓你瞧瞧我能怎樣。
Mike: Oh, really? Really? You want some of that?
喔，真的嗎？真的嗎？你想試試看嗎？
Phoebe: Stop it! Stop it, before someone gets really hurt! Here David, you should just go.
停止！停止！在有人受傷前快停止！拿去，大衛，你應該離開了。
David: All right...But...if I ever do come back from Minsk...well, you-you just better watch out.
好的……但是……如果我從明斯克回來……你最好小心一點。
Mike: Well, if I ever go to Minsk, you'd better watch out.
如果我去明斯克，你也小心點。
David: Oh, you're going to Minsk?
喔，你會去明斯克嗎？
Mike: Well, I might.
喔，或許會。
David: Really? Well, if you do, come in the spring. It's-it's just lovely there.
真的嗎？如果你要去，最好在春天。春天是很宜人的。
Mike: I heard that actually.
事實上我有聽說過。
Phoebe: Ok, well, guys?
好了，你們。
David: Well...Goodbye Phoebe.
再見，菲比。
Phoebe: Bye.
再見。
Mike: Hey, what- are you kidding me?
嘿，你在開玩笑嗎？
David: Righto, righto...Take good care of her.
沒事，沒事……好好照顧她。
Phoebe: I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. If you-if you want your key back, I totally understand.
我很抱歉，非常抱歉。如果你想拿回你的鑰匙，我完全理解。
Mike: It's never gonna happen again right?
這不會再發生了，對不對？
Phoebe: Right! Never! Never! I swear!
沒錯！我發誓絕不！
David: I-I...Oh I...I, I just wanna say, if you uh, if you do ever come to Minsk, that's my number. We'll uhm...we'll party up Vladnik style.
我只想說，如果你來明斯克，這是我的號碼。我們可以以俄羅斯方式開派對。
Joey: Yeah! All right! Hey, hey Ross. Check it out! Sandy taught me Hot-cross Buns.
是！好的！嘿！羅斯！快過來！看珊帝教我吹“甜蜜家庭”。
Ross: Really? Sounded like Three Blind Mice.
真的嗎？聽起來像是“三隻瞎眼鼠”。
Joey: Noooo...Three Blind Mice goes like this...
不，“三隻瞎眼鼠”是這樣……
Ross: I swear to God!
別逼我！
Sandy: Who's up for puppets?
誰想要看布偶秀呢？
Joey: Me! I'm up for puppets!
我！我要看布偶秀！
Sandy: Well, please welcome...The Snufflebumps...Who wants to be Mr. Wigglemunch and who's gonna be the Grumpus?
喔，請歡迎……鼻塞小子！誰想要當搖擺先生 還有誰想當小挑剔？
Ross: Ok, ok...How exactly is a two-month-old supposed to appreciate puppets?
一個兩歲大的嬰兒怎麼看得懂布偶呢？
Sandy: Actually studies have shown that the movement and colors help their cerebral development...The whimsical characters are just for us.
研究報告顯示動作跟顏色可以幫助大腦發展……這些古怪的角色只是要讓我們笑而已。
Joey: I wanna be Mr. Wigglemunch.
我想要當搖擺先生！
Ross: Oh my God!
喔，我的天！
Sandy: Well, I guess we know who's gonna be the Grumpus...
嗯，我想我知道誰要當小挑剔了……
Rachel: Well that was kind of rude!
你實在是有點沒禮貌。
Ross: Oh, I'm sorry. Please apologise to Sandy and the Snufflebumps for me.
喔，我很抱歉請代我跟珊帝還有鼻塞小子道歉。
Rachel: You know, he was just doing his job...
你知道的，他只是在做份內的事……
Ross: Well, you know what...I'm-I'm-I'm sorry I'm the only one who isn't in love with Gary Poppins out there...
你知道嗎？我很抱歉。我是唯一 一個不喜歡“魔法保姆”（迪斯尼音樂劇）的人……
Ross:But I-I just...I can't...I can't go through with this.
但是我只是…… 我就是沒有辦法接受。
Rachel: Oh, come on Ross...Ross: No! Hey, you know what? I-I'm sorry. I would never force you...to-to hire someone you were this uncomfortable with.
別這樣羅斯……不！你知道嗎？我絕對不會強迫你僱用你不喜歡用的人。
Rachel: Oh, that's true.
那倒是真的。
Ross: Thank you!
謝謝你！
Rachel: Well, you're the one who wants to fire him, so you're gonna have to go do it.
是你要解僱他的，你去跟他說。
Sandy: So you see Wigglemunch, that's why it's important to shaaaaaaare...
所以，搖擺先生這就是分享的重要……
Joey: I am learning so much from you.
我從你身上學到好多。
Chandler: Well, I'm off to Tulsa, so if your maitre d' friend has any funny Oklahoma jokes, tell him to e-mail me at www. hahanotsomuch. com.
好了，我要去土爾沙了，如果你的領班朋友有任何好笑的奧克拉荷馬笑話……叫他寄電子郵件到www點，一點都不好笑，點com！
Monica: Honey, you can relax.
親愛的，你可以放輕鬆了。
Monica:Last night at work, Jeffrey told this really sexist joke.
昨晚工作時，傑佛瑞說了個很性別歧視的笑話。
Monica:After that, not so funny anymore.
從此之後，再也沒有那麼好笑了。
Chandler: Really? See, that's the thing: you gotta keep it smart, people!
真的？瞧，都是這樣的：要學聰明一點的！
Monica: Ok, don't miss that flight. You know I love you.
別錯過班機，你知道我愛你。
Chandler: I love you too. And, I like you as a friend.
我也愛你。而我像朋友一樣喜歡你。
Joey: All right. See you later!
沒錯。再見！
Chandler: See ya!
再見！
Joey: Did the guy really make that joke?
那個男的真的有說那個笑話嗎？
Monica: Nah, He still kills me. Last night he had me laughing so hard, I swear, a little pee came out. {Urine Leakage: A Common Health Problem for Women of All Ages}
沒有，他還是讓我捧腹大笑，我發誓昨晚他讓我笑到真的有點尿跑出來。
Ross: Here goes...
好了……
Rachel: I can't watch. It's like firing Elmo.
我沒有辦法看，這就像開除艾摩（《芝麻街》中的角色）一樣。
Ross: Sandy, Hi, we, uhm...we kinda need to talk. I'm afraid it's-it's not working out.
珊帝，嗨，我們……我們可能需要談談。我想恐怕這樣是行不通的。
Sandy: Oh...
喔……
Ross: Yeah, uhm...I mean, Rachel and I, think you-you are great with Emma...uhm...We just feel...
我是說，瑞秋跟我認爲你帶艾瑪實在是很棒……我們只是覺得……
Rachel: You! You feel!
你！是你覺得！
Ross: I...just feel that the...the chemistry isn't right. I'm-I'm sorry.
我只是覺得……沒有化學反應。我很抱歉。
Ross:We're...we're more than happy to give you good recommendation...
我們很樂意幫你寫推薦信的……
Sandy: Oh, no, no, no...That's ok. I had a lot of offers from other families.
不，沒關係，我還有很多其他的家庭要我過去幫忙。
Sandy:I just pickedyou guys 'cause...I liked you the best.
我挑選你們是因爲……我最喜歡你們。
Rachel: Oh, damn you Geller!
喔，該死的，蓋勒！
Ross: Anyway, uhm...Well, I'm glad there's, there's no hard feelings.
好了，我很高興沒有任何不愉快。
Sandy: No, none at all.
一點也沒有。
Sandy:You need to be happy with whoever is in your home...
你們需要一個能相處融洽的人才行……
Sandy:Although-although if you don't mind telling me, what was our problem? May-maybe it's something I can work on in the future.
不過，如果你不介意告訴我……問題是出在哪裏呢？或許是我在將來可以改進的地方。
Ross: No, you know, it's-it's uhm nothing you did, it's...it's uhm...my issue.
不，不關你的事，是我的問題。
Sandy: What is it?
是什麼呢？
Sandy:Please?
拜託？
Ross: You know, I'm just not uhm...that comfortable with a guy who's as sensitive as you.
你知道，我只不過是不習♥慣跟像你一樣敏感的男人相處。
Sandy: That's fair. Al-although, can I ask...why do you think that is?
可以諒解。但是，我可以問你爲什麼會是這樣嗎？
Ross: Why...I...I don't know. Uhm...errrr...maybe...maybe because of my father?
爲什麼？我不知道。或許是我父親的緣故。
Sandy: Hmm.
嗯。
Ross: I mean, uhm...you know when I was growing up he was kind of a tough guy.
在我的成長過程中，他總是像個硬漢一樣。
Ross:You know a-a-and as a kid I wasn't the athlete I am now.
小時候，我不像現在一樣這麼有運動感。
Rachel: Huh ha ha!
哈哈哈哈！
Ross: I play squash! Anyway, uhm...I always get the feeling he thought I was too sensitive.
我會玩壁球！反正，我總是覺得他認爲我太敏感。
Sandy: That must've been hard.
那一定很難受。
Ross: It was hard...I remember...I was in my bedroom...playing with my dinosaurs...playing and learning...and my father walks in and says...he says...What're you doing with those things? What's wrong with you, why aren't you...why aren't you outside playing like a...like a real boy?
的確是很難受……我記得有一次我在房間跟我的恐龍玩……是一邊玩一邊學習……然後我父親走了進來說……你是在跟那些東西做什麼？你有什麼不對勁？爲什麼你不能去外面像真正的男生一樣玩呢？
Sandy: But you are a real boy!
但是你是真正的男生啊！
Ross: I know I am!...And when it's summer, and it's hot, why can't you wear a tank top?
我知道我是的！夏天很熱的時候，爲什麼不能穿背心裝呢？
Sandy: It's All right! Listen, crying is good. It lets the boo hoos out.
沒關係，哭泣是好事。大聲哭出來吧。
Ross: Here come some more...
哭出來了！
Rachel: Emma, One day you're gonna grow up and be a big girl just like your daddy.
艾瑪，有天你會長成大女孩，就跟你爹地一樣。
Sandy/Grumpus: And what's the one kind of boat that can never, ever sink?
哪一種船是永遠不會沉的船呢？
Joey/Wigglemunch: What kind?
哪一種？
Sandy/Grumpus: A friend-ship...
“友船”（音同友誼）！
Joey: Wow! You blow my mind.
哇！你真讓我大開眼界！
Sandy: Oh, I gotta go.
我要走了。
Joey: Aaahh, how much do I owe you?
我該給你多少呢？
Sandy: Twenty bucks.
二十塊。
Joey: Oh, it's like the cheapest college ever.
這真是史上最便宜的大學了！
Sandy: Uh, I'll see you tomorrow.
明天見。
Joey: Ok, bye-bye, Skdandy.
拜拜，珊蒂。