如果我不付飯錢 你還會愛我嗎
Would you still love me if I couldn't pay for dinner?
大概會吧
Possibly.
好
Yeah.
我們要怎麼辦
What do we do?
讓我想想
I'm thinking.
我們可以大吵一架
We, we could have a big row.
乾點出格的事 他們就會轟我們走
And... and throw some shit. They might kick us out.
我之前這麼幹過 太引人注目了 不好
Uh, been done, and it would draw too much attention.
你幹嘛呢
Wh... What are you doing?
我把鞋脫了
I'm taking my shoes off.
我先走
I'm going to leave first,
然後你看準時間
and then when the time is right,
比如服務員沒注意到你的時候
like when the maitre d's not, um, looking...
你就趕緊跑 我在街上等你
you meet me down the street.
先生 結♥帳♥
Uh, excuse me, sir?
快跑 快跑
Hey, run! Run, run, run!
混♥蛋♥
Fucker!
親愛的
Baby!
你還好嗎
Are you OK?
快跑沒氣了
Oh, I'm dying.
我們好贊啊
That was so epic!
我們甩掉他了嗎
Well, did we lose him?
不知道
I don't know.
真的 都不知道他們追沒追
Really, did they even chase us?
怎麼了
What?
看啊 看啊
Hey, hey, hey, look, look, look. Look at them.
多漂亮 是吧
This is pretty good, isn't it?
是啊
Yeah, it is.
怎麼
What?
我只有一顆心
There's only one heart in this body.
對我仁慈點 好嗎
Have mercy on me.
閉嘴
Shut up.
咱這是聽啥呢
What the fuck are we listening to?
我生活的主題曲
The soundtrack of my life.
挺好
That's nice.
能不能趁我還沒投河自盡 把這歌♥趕緊換了
Can we change it before I dive off a bridge?
那你想聽什麼
Oh, there's something you would rather listen to?
無所謂 只要不是這種
I don't care, just something
難聽到讓我想自殺的就好
that doesn't make me want to kill myself?
-康納 只是首歌♥而已 -快換了吧
-It's just a song, Conor. -Come on, change it.
-要咖啡嗎 -算了
-Coffee? -Eh, I'm good with that.
-謝謝 -那好
-Thank you. -Great.
你混♥蛋♥的本事越來越高了
You know, you're developing a real talent for being an asshole.
等你到我這歲數 你也會變得這麼混♥蛋♥
Well, when you grow up, you can too.
你們這都生氣啥呢
What are you all pissy about?
我就等你來同情我呢
There is the compassion I've been looking for.
是啊 我生來就幹這個的
That's what I'm here for.
你故意的嘛 亞歷克西斯
Seriously, Alexis?
咋了
What?
-這一點也不好笑 -我覺得挺好笑
-It's not funny. It's not funny. -It's kind of funny.
快換了吧
Change it?
不換
No.
換吧
Change it.
天嚕
Whoa!
你剛纔砸的 是你自己店裏的東西
That was yours, just so you know.
別這麼混♥蛋♥ 兄弟
Oh, pull your head out of your ass, man.
你管我
Blow me.
我出去走走
I'm gonna go take a stroll.
行 你小心點兒
All right. Hey, be careful.
外面的世界很危險
It's a dangerous world out there.
那是
Apparently.
愛你
Love you.
你好啊 拉爾夫
Hey, Ralph.
幾點了
What time is it?
六點半
6:30.
你今天出門了嗎
You get outside today?
喫東西了嗎
You eat something, or...?
沒
Mm-mm.
你還好嗎
You OK?
我昨晚失眠了 好像忘了怎麼睡覺
I swear, I forgot how to fall asleep last night.
康納 別
Don't, Conor.
我夢到你有外遇了
I had a dream you were having an affair.
被你發現了
How'd you find out?
這個月我第四次做這樣的夢了
It's the fourth one I've had this month.
我跟誰外遇
Who am I having the affair with?
一個黑頭髮女生 我也不知道是誰
Some vague girl with dark hair.
-可能只是戴着假髮的你啊 -不是的
-Maybe it's you in a wig. -It's not.
只是夢 沒什麼好擔心吧
Yeah, well, I wouldn't worry about it, all right?
在我回餐館之前
You want to order some food
我們要叫東西喫嗎
or something before I have to go back?
你去吧
Maybe you should.
好 那我叫了
Yeah, I, I'm gonna.
我是說你應該去搞外遇
You should have an affair.
我聽不懂你說什麼了
I... don't know what you're talking about.
你說什麼呢
What are you talking about?
咱們最近過得不怎麼愉快
Things haven't been very chipper around here.
別這麼說
Come on.
不幸慢慢都會過去的
Come on, we're getting by.
你還打算假裝多久
How long are you gonna keep pretending?
說真的 我不知道 你是怎麼從喫的扯到這上面的
Seriously, I don't know how we got from food to this, but...
你能好好聽我說一下嗎
OK, just listen to me for one second.
不 我不想聽你說這個
I don't... no, I don't want to listen to you for a second.
你找外遇或許對我們都有好處
It might be a good thing.
能讓我們的情境更加清晰
It would clear the air.
能讓我們之間煥然一新
It would definitely shake things up between us.
我不知道 你從哪兒聽的這些亂七八糟
I don't know what planet you're on,
但在咱們這兒
but on this planet,
搞外遇就是搞外遇
fucking around is fucking around,
搞外遇 不是解決問題的最佳方案
and it's not usually the best way to smooth things over.
好吧
Fine.
你要去接麼
Are you gonna get that?
-你想接你就接 -我不想接
-You get it if you want. -I don't want to get it.
可能又是你♥爸♥
Well, it's probably your dad again.
你想那樣嗎
Is that what you want?
哪樣
What?
搞外遇 你想搞外遇嗎
To go fuck around... is that what you want?
我也不知道我想哪樣
I don't know what I want.
真的
Seriously?
你想那樣嗎
Is it what you want?
不想
No.
我們的婚姻 真的已經這麼不像樣了嗎
Are we really doing this badly?
康納 這一年已經夠難熬了
Conor, it's been an impossible fucking year,
所以請你 不要問這麼傻♥逼♥的問題好嗎
so please don't ask a stupid question like that.
那啥...
So, uh...
報紙上有什麼新鮮事
what's the paper saying today?
說現在的世界 有什麼致命的東西 我們都得死
Oh, apparently, we're all gonna die of something.
是 我聽說過這個
Yeah, I heard about that.
這些新聞我真是跟不上了
I can't keep up with all this shit.
你看 全球氣候變暖 冰山融化
You know, the ice caps keep melting,
阿富汗有爆♥炸♥
something else exploded in Afghanistan,
民♥主♥黨是一羣娘炮
Democrats are bunch of pussies,
致命流感
flu pandemics,
德庫寧的藝術展
de Kooning's at the MoMA,
青檸色是今夏流行色
supposedly lime green is the hot color for summer,
還有 傻♥逼♥洋基隊又輸了
and the stupid Yankees lost again.
我感覺我腦袋都要爆♥炸♥了
I feel like my head's gonna burst.
那你應該下次試試 關了音樂再看報
Well, you should try reading without the music on, or the TV.
電視也關了
Or both.
我受不了寂靜
Can't stand the silence.
給你買♥♥了拿鐵
I got you a latte.