異形魔怪5：血脈
我叫畢甘默
My name is Burt Gummer.
我有很多外號♥
And I've been called many things.
槍狂
Gun enthusiast,
怪獸獵人 末日預備者
monster-hunter, doomsday-prepper.
我拒絕這些標籤
I reject all these labels.
我是生存者
What I am is a survivalist.
我走遍內華達州和墨西哥的沙漠
I've scoured the dirt and dust of Nevada and Mexico,
冒着生命危險 搜捕一種巨型地下怪物
putting my life on the line to hunt super-size subterranean
他們以喫人爲生 名叫圭布
man-eating predators called Graboids.
我利用我對本地的認識 直覺和炮火
Using a combination of local knowledge, intuition and firepower,
成功地將這種致命生物
I've managed to control this deadly species,
限制在北半球
and keep them confined to the Northern Hemisphere.
加入我
Join me.
跟我進入這死亡沙漠的地底
As I enter into and beneath the Sands of Hell.
下午3點
1500 hours.
穿越這完美的沙漠王國 內華達
Moving through the desert of Perfection, Nevada.
和圭布埋身肉搏
Ground zero for war with the Graboids.
如果你是新來的 對圭布一無所知
For those of you newcomers, who don't have a clue about Graboids,
圭布
Graboids
讓我向你解釋下
let me bring you up to speed.
圭布是一種邪惡的地下獵食者
The Graboid is a vicious subterranean predator,
大概9米長 有半硬化的內部構造
about 30 feet in length with a semi-rigid internal structure.
他能感受獵物的震波
It senses its prey seismically,
從口中伸處三條 像蛇一樣的觸鬚
and employs three powerful, snake-like oral tentacles
捕獲獵物 將其塞入食道中
to ensnare its prey, and pull it into the Graboid's gullet.
那裏可不好玩
It is not a pleasant venue.
相信我 我到過那裏
Trust me. I've been there.
如果這還不夠 圭布還會 生出三隻叫史力的醜陋幼獸
If that weren't enough, Graboids give birth to three ugly spawn we call Shriekers.
他們很矮 看不見東西 用兩隻腳半蹲着行走
Short, squat, and blind bipedal bad boys
用生物紅外線探測並捕殺獵物
that sense and hunt their prey using infrared sensors.
他們又會生下艾巴
These, in turn, give rise to the Ass Blaster,
一種有翼的食肉獸
a winged, predatory carnivore
他們會從肛♥門♥中噴出
which uses a mixture of volatile chemicals in its...
一種化學混合氣體
...nether regions
利用這衝力升上空中
to blast into the air and swoop down upon its victims.
艾巴生下的蛋 卵孚化後變成新的圭布
Ass Blasters carry eggs that hatch and become new Graboids,
開始新的地獄輪迴
beginning this hellish cycle anew.
我和圭布 史力和艾巴交手無數
I have survived a great many skirmishes with Graboids,
並生存至今
along with their Shrieker and Ass Blaster kin.
這令我具獨一無二的資格
And that makes me uniquely qualified
教你面對他們時 如何生存
to teach you how to survive whatever life throws at you.
記着 生命和生存
And remember, life and survival
從這裏開始
starts here.
誰餓了
Who's hungry?
人類的搖籃
南非
你在做什麼
What're you doing?
收聲
Shut your blow hole.
我在追蹤
I'm tracking.
你感覺到嗎
You feel that?
你唯一能感覺到的是 我一腳踢你屁♥股♥
The only thing you're gonna feel is my boot in your bum.
看你那條瘸腿怎踢我
Yeah, good luck, with that gimp leg of yours.
這地方很無聊
This place is gut boring.
是的 我又餓又累
Yeah. And I'm tired, and I'm starving.
我們在這一整天 只看到一羣土狼
And the only thing we've seen all day is a pack of spotted hyena.
這是自然 兄臺
Yeah, it's just the nature of things, boet.
說到自然 我要送孩子們去泳池
Yeah, well, talking about nature, I'm gonna drop the kids off at the pool.
向西北看 在高原後
Looking northwest, over the Highveld.
報告說發現很多奇異動物
All those reports about exotic animals,
這裏沒有野生動物
there's no wildlife here.
說到野生動物
Well, speaking of wildlife,
不知我老婆會否回到我身邊
I wonder if my wife's gonna come back to me.
如果她有腦的話
If she's got brains,
絕對不會
definitely not.
你這無可救藥的蠢材
You're a complete and utter idiot.
我很痛苦
I mean, I'm hurting here. I'm in pain.
你卻嘲笑我
And you mock me.
比臣 你聽到嗎
Basson. You hear that?
我什麼也沒聽到 我在開會
I didn't hear anything. I'm in conference.
就在這裏 這裏
It's right here. Here, here, here, here.
比臣
Basson?
德亞
Dreyer!
你掉得很深
That's a long drop.
你沒看到這洞嗎
Didn't you see this gigantic hole?
我想我摔裂了屁♥股♥
I think I broke my butt.
我去找條繩來
I'm gonna grab a rope.
兄弟
Bro!
我來了 老友 放鬆
I'm coming, man, relax.
比臣 在
-Basson? -Yeah?
我扔繩子下去 你抓住它 我拉你上來 好嗎
I'm gonna throw this rope down. You grab onto it, I'm gonna pull you up, all right?
快點 下面有些東西
Hurry up. There's something down here.
好的 抓住繩子
Okay, grab the rope.
救我出去 這裏有些東西 快拉我上去
Get me out of here, there's something down here. Just get me out of here.
是的 可能是我前妻泰蕾莎
Yeah, probably my ex-wife, Teresa.
拉
Pull!
好的 你也幫幫忙 來吧
Yeah, just help me out man, come on.
你得減肥了
You need to lose some weight.
救我出去 我瀨尿了
Get me out of here. I'm pissing myself.
比臣
Basson!
比臣
Basson!
莫哈維沙漠
內華達南部
41.6攝氏度
107 degrees Fahrenheit.
你好嗎 內華達
Hello, Nevada.
耶
Oh, yeah.
在野外一切都更好味
Everything tastes better outdoors.
但如果你想在這享受 營養豐富的美食
However, if one wants to enjoy a source of sustenance out here,
就要大膽些
one has to seize the culinary initiative
仙人掌汁 梨汁 即食砂鍋煲
將醜陋的生物變爲美餐
when it rears its ugly head.
我們來看看
So, let's review.
我用50分鐘搭建起這土爐
It took me 50 minutes to build this improvised clay oven.
32分鐘來生火
Thirty-two minutes to fire up the scrub wood,
加熱內部
heat the interior,
將蛇放進去並封好口
feed in that snake and seal the door.
現在我們就等他們 變爲美食佳餚吧
Now we wait as this little baby turns snake into snack.
很熱
That's hot!
好了
And voilá!
熱辣辣 美味多汁 富含蛋白質
One sizzling, succulent piece of pure protein.
然後加入畢的勁好味牌 仙人掌汁醃料
And you can bet that Burt's Bullseye Brand Cactus Juice Marinade
令這變得更惹味
will eradicate any trace of that
保證不會像雞肉
"tastes like chicken" residue.
你♥他♥媽♥是誰
Who the hell are you?
耶
Yowza!
聞起來像雞肉
Smells like chicken.
這就是他
There he is. Huh?
神祕的傳奇人物
The man, the myth, the legend.
畢甘默 我是卓華斯韋加
Burt effing Gummer. Travis B. Welker.
對不起 先生 我該早些通知你
Sorry, sir. I should've told you that.
我無意跟蹤你 但我是你忠實擁護
Don't mean to be all stalkery, but I've been a big fan of yours
自從看了你2000年的陰謀論劇集起
since your Y2K conspiracy series.
我可以收工了
Well, I guess that's a wrap.
不要擅離職守 萊利 還沒到休息時閒
Maintain position, Riley. It's not Miller Time, yet.
他是你的了
He's all yours, buddy boy.
你的設備在那邊
Your gear's piled over there.
多謝那工作
And thanks for the Vegas gig.
什麼工作
What Vegas gig?
《拉斯維加斯嬌妻》
The Real Housewives of Las Vegas.
你不能這樣拋下我
You can't just adiós on me!
這是工會的工作 有退休金和醫保 所以...
It's a union gig, pension and health. So...
這是你新的攝影師
That is your new camera guy,
他口碑很好
and, well, he comes highly recommended.