Can I have some breakfast please?
It's 3 quid for a cup of coffee and a bacon sandwich.
And obviously if you want it heated up it is another tenner.
That's the orange ones, right?
And it's another tenner to park your jeep.
There you go.
搞什麼啊 小可愛 你要知道他這是在...
Excuse me, love. You do realise that he's taking the...
Why don't you go to the bathroom, Mandy?
Use the big mirror - eh?
You can put lipstick on a pig, man. It's still a pig.
Yeah! Yeah! Fuck Off!
May I use your bathroom?
Of course you can, darling.
Can I help?
Why do you work for a man who speaks to you like that?
No idea darling.
It's probably the same reason that I married the bastard.
Why do you stay married to a man who doesn't love you?
You are weird.
You foreign or something? You don't sound foreign.
Can I have some of that?
拿去吧 親愛的 反正也是便宜貨
Just have the lot, darling. It is cheap shit anyway.
And listen. That fellow of mine just stole from you.
You do know that, don't you?
你有時候可以當個混♥蛋♥ 卡爾 你知道...
You can be a right arsehole sometimes, Carl. You know that...
Is everything okay?
Not really, no.
You forgot your bacon sarnie.
Mandy. I've had enough pig for one day.
God. Got me right in the eye.
You know what,
if it is alright with you I will have that sandwich.
It just... the pig line just came to me
and I just kinda rolled with it but I really am quite starving
so thanks so much. That's really nice of you.
just warming the old girl up.
Here we go....
All I am saying is that,
you have never been very good with women.
What has that got to do with anything?
Well, you have just been dumped, kid.
Yeah, by someone I went out with for three years.
I'm not having a go, mate.
I'm just saying when it comes to girls
you have always been a duck out of water.
What...So completely fine then?
Ducks are amphibious, Jay,
so they are completely fine in or out of water.
What do you mean bullshit?
This is what I am talking about, bro.
No one cares about all of your univers-y bullshit.
We literally learnt that in year 2, Jay.
That's not even junior school.
好吧 聽着 重點是
OK, look. The point is
no matter how clever you think you are
you are never gonna get anywhere, cause...
- you got shit clothes. - Right!
- A shit haircut. - Ok.
And...a dick like a burst balloon.
I've got a perfectly average sized penis, Jay.
-好吧 你想忘掉艾麗嗎 -不太想
- OK. Do you wanna get over Ellie? - Not really.
- Do you wanna prove that you are a big man? - Obviously not.
OK then, you have to speak
to the next woman that walks in this pub.
Whoever they are.
I literally said no to both those things.
Hey, do you want me to say it?
- I'm gonna... - Don't.
- I will say it. - Don't say it.
- I shall say it. - Please don't.
- I'm gonna say it. - I rather you didn't.
You are my little brother... and...
我 愛 你
I love yooouu!
And I want you to have some fun. Alright?
No! This is not non negotiable.
You mean it is, non negotiable.
Little brother - look...
Welcome my friend to the woman of my dreams.
I am so sorry.
I will get you another one. at... the bar.
Ooohh, sorry. Sorry.
- Can I have a glass of cider? - Sure.
And..whatever the angry looking man behind me was drinking.
Can I ask you something?
當然 快問吧 小夥伴
Yes. Yeah - fire away, amigo.
Not amigo. Just friend.
Not that we're friends.
Although they do say a stranger is a friend you haven't met yet.
We have technically met, haven't we?
I consider it sort of depends on definition, so like...
Sorry, you had a question.
This is definitely a shoe, right?
I mean, I just...I feel like
there has been some sort of a fundamental mistake.
I mean... ...no one else seems to be wearing them.
Sorry, It's just that I never really dress up this smart before
and I'm feeling a bit...
不不不 我懂 那就像...
Yeah. No no no. Completely. That's...
It's the same for the one in 'She's all that'
and look what happened there.
What did happen there?
Oh, at the start of the film everyone's like
'she's a gnome"
and then she pops this dress on by the end
and then everyone's kicking themselves, cause they are like
"Ahh, turned out that she wasn't that all along."
It's a classic. You've gotta watch it.
I put it on my list.