劇集 | 浪女大廚（2014） | 導航列表
Hey, brought ya breakfast in bed.
Oh, thank you.
You know I didn't get much sleep last night,
so I'm feeling a little...
Interesting, I'm feeling a little punchy myself.
Yeah, I are.
So, uh, what would one do if they're feelin' punchy?
Well, I would imagine if he or she had a punch card,
one might use it. Shwah!
To be honest, I didn't want breakfast.
Oh, to be honest, I didn't make any.
Did Josh come down yet?
I hate being late. Gives me panic sweats.
How's that different from your on-time sweats?
What are you doing? Those are Josh's underpants!
Give me those, fool.
And where the hell is the coffee?
You bitches don't do anything around here.
That's not true. Gabi's doing Josh right now.
Ugh, that stupid punch card.
It's so gross that Gabi has
that disgusting sexual arrangement with Josh.
You're just jealous.
No! It's not like...
everything I've ever wanted.
How many punches do they have anyway?
Make that nine.
That was great!
I mean, this punch card thing is the best.
Yeah, it's amazing.
We're having sex without feelings.
我是說 我下面有感覺 但是
I mean, I had feelings in my parts, but...
Not in my hearts.
I gotta be honest with you, Gabi.
I did not think you could
handle an all sex non-emotional liaison.
That's funny, because I thought the same thing about you.
Without the big word at the end.
We almost forgot something.
Oh, no, no. I don't do that.
不 加比 我說的是這個
No. Gabi, I'm talking about this.
I don't know what that is, but I don't do that either.
Gabi, it's a hole-puncher for our punch cards.
Aw. It's our first punch out of ten.
Man, I can't believe we already used one up.
Yeah. We only got nine left.
是啊 我還剩五次 你還剩四次
Yeah. I've got five and you've got four.
Why do I have to use the first punch?
You know what? I'm cool with it.
Age before beauty.
公平起見 下次用我的 就現在吧
Well, and to be fair, I will use the next punch. How's now?
Maybe this time, beauty can come first.
Oh, my god! Stop!
No, I can't. I'm starving.
I'm having lots of sex now.
No, no. I, uh-- I need your leftovers
to bring into work for Kendrick.
Ugh! Oh, my god, are you still after him?
Yes. And your food is the reason
we have lunch together every day.
He loves your cooking.
Which he actually thinks is my cooking,
So in a way, he loves me.
Yeah. You know what else he loves? His girlfriend.
But I have a plan to be his new girlfriend.
Okay, look, it all centers around our lunches.
First, I establish myself as a confidant.
Then, I subliminally undermine his relationship.
And then finally,
when my abuelita's hex starts working...
his relationship will burn to the ground.
And I will be there to rise like a phoenix from the ashes.
As his new girlfriend.
Wow, not having sex for a long time makes you a little crazy.
Yeah, well, having sex for a day makes you a little judgy.
All I'm saying is what Josh and I have is working. Okay?
We're getting along great.
We're having sex without all the neediness and the drama.
And the caring and the trust and the intimacy.
All that crap that made us a really horrible couple.
Gabi, I know you better than anyone,
And you can not handle a purely sexual relationship.
It's just a matter of time before things get weird.
不會奇怪的 好嗎 跟上潮流 索菲亞
It's not gonna get weird, okay? Get with the times, Sofia.
Boyfriends are out, punch cards are in.
That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard.
Now cook me something
that I can pretend is mine so Kendrick falls in love with me.
What are you doing?
All the scratching in the world
won't get rid of that second chin.
I'm on WebMD trying to figure out what's wrong with my face.
Oh, well, maybe you just allergic to ugly.
It says the itch could be anything.
From using a new shaving cream to--
Wait, what's this?
Oh, that's the new detergent I'm using. Tude.
"The burning is how you know it's working."
What the hell kind of detergent is this?
I got it in the discount aisle.
Wait. Did you wash Josh's underwear in that?
Yep. I followed the instructions.
I added a scoop to the water.
Waited till the smoke cleared.
Then I added the laundry.
I wiped my face with his boxers. That's why I have a rash.
What the hell are you doing shopping in the discount aisle?
Josh is loaded.
What's your angle?
Every month, Josh gives me a cleaning budget.
Which I manage properly.
So you buy cheap products and then pocket the rest?
Oh, don't worry.
I won't tell him.
If you cut me in for half.
I can't believe I'm being blackmailed by somebody who's not black!
劇集 | 浪女大廚（2014） | 導航列表